I’m almost finished with chemotherapy! In between naps, I do a happy dance and look forward to a life without doctor’s appointments every week. Right now, it looks like the last week of January is the last treatment. After that will be a surgery to finish up the reconstruction. Then I’ll start hormones that will knock me into menopause for the next five years.
Today is five months from my diagnosis. Five months ago, my life changed. Five months ago I thought my life was over.
Four months ago, my breasts were gone. Four months ago, I could barely lift my arms to take care of myself. Four months ago, I was afraid. This month was filled with surgeries and a deep, dark pit of the unknown. This was the beginning of chemotherapy.
Three months ago, I lost my hair. Three months ago, I spent half my time feeling nauseated and exhausted. Three months ago, I saw a little light at the end of this tunnel. This was the month I finished the worst chemotherapy and started a less painful kind of chemo.
Two months ago, I started working out with a trainer twice a week. Two months ago, I felt like I was getting part of my life back. Two months ago, I realized how thankful I am for my friends, family, and caregivers.
One month ago, I realized my diagnosis didn’t mean I was finished. One month ago, my hair started coming back. One month ago, I became more inspired to take care of myself and fight to live.
This month I finish the tough stuff and get ready for the next step. I learn to live as a new woman. I may not have the same body I had six months ago, but I’ve learned a thing or two about what’s on the inside being what really counts. I’ve learned to step back and view things with perspective.
This year I have to have a new me, the new me is either going to be defeated and bummed about all the crap that’s happened in the last five months OR the new me is going to rise above and learn from the crap. Breast cancer is not a death sentence. I am going to live and live well. Even if my hair grows back in all silvery gray and even if I don’t have nipples, I’m going to be HAPPY!
Stick with me, this year is going to be the most interesting and exciting year of my life and I’d love to have you along for the ride.